I Knew Her Before She was Born...

Yesterday we attended a graduation party for a young lady in the community. She is the youngest daughter of local friends. We remember when they talked of having a third child. Now she is graduating from high school! She has grown into a fine young woman and has done very well. Time flies as we age and I realize how many of the kids we know today weren't even born when we moved here!

For God there is no time. He knew us before we were born. He has numbered our days. He has and know his plans for us. Wow!

Cool after very hot...

This morning is cool and beautiful. Yesterday was outrageously hot for a May day. I found it hard to get anything done. Today I have already hung one load of wash and cleaned up the kitchen and it isn't even 8AM. We are looking forward to three quiet but productive days with DH off on Monday for the holiday. These days our times together have been sweet, lots of giggling and easy conversation.
God has blessed our marriage and I am so thankful.

Humiliated...upset

Yesterday I found myself going in several directions at once. I offered to do the dogs for DH as he was running late (or so we thought). As I was preparing to leave for the morning's work I turned on the stove to warm up the bacon grease that goes over the dog food. I sat in the living surfing for a bit and completely forgot the grease.
Wow...I didn't notice until the kitchen was completely filled with smoke and ran to see what was burning! I put the frying pan outside and opened all the kitchen and bedroom windows. Then I decided to open the living room windows. At that pint the smoke alarm went off. It is wired in and I could not shut it off even with the electricity off. The smoke was getting to my poor asthmatic lungs and the sound was hurting my pride (someone would hear and know how foolish I'd been). I finally got it off and left the house for 3 hours . When I got back the smoke had cleared and except for being very shook up I was okay.
This morning I am remembering His words, "I have loved you with an everlasting love." Its not conditional on my always being on top of things. Praise God.

God has set the lonely in families

I saw these geese today when I was out doing census. I thought of the verse in Proverbs that says, "God sets the lonely in families." I was thankful for the wonderful family that surrounds me with their love and care.

Family

Family, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

Wonderful day

I've had a relaxed and wonderful day. I finished an order for a customer and got paid. Hurrah! I also took some yard sale kid clothes and dressed a doll. It was great fun. In the late afternoon the sun finally came out. Good weather promised for the week. I am ready.

Dismal

The weather has been cold and dismal for the last couple of days. Some of my tomato seedlings have died, probably from the cold. The morning glories I put out look terrible and I don't thinl they will make it. I am discouraged.

I am struggling with low energy and tons of physical work to do. It is my eyes, not God's I am seeing through. "Come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest." Lord, here I come.

A Day of Rest

I spent the day taking it easy, hoping the rest would make my breathing better. DH thoughtfully took me out to supper and we had a nice ride together. He is just terrific and makes me feel so special. God has truly blessed me.

We four

We four, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

Morning mist

Morning mist, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

DH gave me a new camera for Mother's Day. I have been enjoying it in the early hours of this beautiful morning.

Water droplets on the lupine leaves

Water droplets on the lupine leaves, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

Any breakfast yet?

Any breakfast yet?, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

These hens rushed toward me early this morning as I tried to take sunrise pictures. They don't care what I am doing only that I give them a handout.
Do I rush to God for my handout?
I wonder?

Mothers Day 2007

As I sit here this morning I realize that I have been a mother for more than 40 years! My first little one was a precious baby girl that I vowed to care for and protect no matter what. She was the delight of my life and has never ceased to be that for me. Her wonderful personality paved the way for a desire for more children and they, too, are a delight to my heart. The last sweet baby girl became the exclamation point it my life. Full of a zest for life, she always wants to try out new ideas and dreams... My life as a mother has been full to overflowing. The Lord is indeed good.

Jury Duty

Yesterday was another long day. I along with 11 others heard testimony for most of the day on an "operating under the influence" case. It was a basically two different stories of the same event. One from the policeman and one from the accused and his wife. Both sides agreed that the driver was not driving erratically, that he stopped for the stop sign safety, pulled out safely and stopped for the policeman safely. The driver had some "clues"of alcohol in his system and he admitted to having two beers earlier in the day. He was able to follow the policeman's instructions according to the policeman and his speech was not slurred.

I was the foreperson and we voted before starting deliberation in order to see where we stood. Unanimous...end of story. It boiled down to the facts that agreed and body language from the witnesses. The policeman was squirmy and unable to look at the defendent while the defendant was calm and direct. After a long wait of two years for this trial, the defendent was found not guilty. A worthwhile day.

I suspect my body language with God is squirmy! I need to be very honest with Him and more with myself as He knows all. What is, is...He loves me anyway. As Amy Grant sang, "Being good is just a fable. " It is the shed blood of the Lamb that sets me free.

proverbs

proverbs, originally uploaded by Amity Beane.

Sunset

Sunset, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

God has good things in store for me...

I needed to give myself permission to stay home today. And I did. The house is clean, the laundry done and I feel like a new person. I really like order in my life and struggle against overload. God will continue to love me no matter what. I can believe Him in this.

A Clean Heart

"Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a right spirit within me. " I need the heart cleansing that only God can give. I want to be His person, in a relationship with Him, not" a work to please Him" relationship. A right spirit is what I need. And I am asking, I am asking.

Cleaning up

The day is fast passing and I am doing some picking up. I finished my "doll quota" and am taking a breather. I have to go to jury tomorrow so the day will be shot for anything else. Tuesday will be a recovery day so Wednesday will be the start of anything new. Therefore the sewing machine comes off the dining room table, the bins get sorted and things put away and I start fresh midweek.

Gas prices are so high that I need to make sure I get the things I need while I am out tomorrow. I expect to do some food shopping and need to get a good list going. I also want to start some flower seedlings. The weather is suppose to warm up next week. We could see high 70s for a couple of days.

I have a slight agitation in my spirit today. I'm not sure why. Several things have been irritants in my life lately and I am not sure why. It could just be that I am tired and have missed some loose ends.

The second six

The second six, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

A view from my window

A view from my window, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

I was standing by the window this AM and was surprised to see these two does so close. It must be spring.

Beautiful Morning

What a beautiful morning. The sun was shining into the bedroom reflecting off the full length mirror and bathing the bed with sunlight. What a way to wake up! I am trying to remember that God's hand is in all I do and to slow down and no overthink. He has my future in His hands and I need to stop grabbing it back!

Little gifts of love He showers on me every day and I sometimes miss them for the hurry.

Day off

I spent yesterday working on doll making. I want to learn all I can about how to do it to my satisfaction. It is a relaxing past time and maybe in time will become a way to make some money. As I heard toward retirement , pension free, I need to capitalize on some of my skills. Well, thats my thinking anyway. God may have other plans.

Today needs to be a focus day. I have census addresses to locate and home keeping to attend to. Then there the never ending pack or not pack for the "in case the house sells" scenario. I have bins of fabric lining the upstais hall. That needs to be moved/sorted and labeled, whether we move or not. So much to do so little time. I need to remember, "my yoke is easy, my burden is light..."

My first boy.

IMG_5539_edited, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

He will show up on Etsy soon.

Day off doings!

Day off doings!, originally uploaded by mabeane6.

Letting Go

Even though I know, I know, I know, that God is the Provider. He is the I Am. He is El Shaddai (the God who is more than enough). I still think I am. In my weary brain I keep having the battle of being the one who needs to pull her own weight and prove that I am worthy. I missed a lot of mothering growing up. I had a tired, depressed, distracted,unwilling, overwhelmed mother figure who found her life not to her liking. It left me constantly trying to get her attention to be loved and cared for. I guess I have translated that to God's care, thinking I need to keep working to get His attention. I long to be myself in His love and care but I have been able to get only small glimpses as I struggle to do it all myself. Foolish, foolish person that I am. He loves me, not what I can do. Pieces of my life reflect that I know that but...